I have been slacking with my writing lately and that makes me sad. Actually I am starting to notice a correlation. When life gets crazy often times things I do for myself such as this blog are the first thing to go. However, then it seems to make the craziness even worse and creates somewhat of an endless cycle. I need to remember no matter how crazy things get I need to still make some time for the things I love.
One thing I have always struggled with is letting others peoples thoughts and opinions get to me. I let their wants affect mine. For example if I want to go do something and they don't then I am just like "oh well we don't have to go I guess." I do feel like I am getting better about this though. When I wanted to take Ashley to the fireworks the night before Thanksgiving and no one wanted to go I just took her by myself. When I was at the golf tournament and mom needed to leave I found another ride home so I could stay and enjoy myself. When I want to go somewhere and no one else does I can go anyway. There have been times in my life where I would feel completely guilty about this, but I am coming to a point where I can realize how important it is to do the things that make me happy even if no one else wants to. Lately when I want to go do something and my boyfriend or my friends can't I have been making an effort to do it anyway. This is something that is definitely pushing the limits for me, but it is also important. I need to put myself out there and do things for me even if no one else is doing them with me.
It is very important to have people in your life you can share things with, and who will be there to enjoy things with you, however it is also important to be able to do it for yourself, when no one else is there with you. It is important to do things because you want to or you need to. It is important to be able to stand up for yourself and what you need even if it goes against what others are saying. This is a hard thing to learn and yet I am trying. I will always be the kind of person who cares about others and their thoughts and feelings, but I am learning to do it in a way that doesn't make me sacrifice my own. However I just have to tell myself.... yes their thoughts matter, but "YOU MATTER TOO!"